Monday, December 29, 2008

I'm Back

Hi Friends!

What a way to start a blog....write a couple of blogs and then go missing for about six weeks. This is why I need to get busy and write books instead of blogs!

Well I have been doing my own thing for the six weeks and managed to lose 12 pounds but I need to throw in that I also had that nasty cold flu as well! 12 pounds I will take however it comes of my friends got the throw up kinda flu and lost 10 pounds in 22 hours so if you are in the Richmond area and you have that please call me over to your house. Just kidding and don't worry about writing me telling me that isn't the way to lose your energy.

I am making a serious effort to start my work out routine this week before the big 2009 hits. I think if I can make it a routine while I am off this week then next week when regular life returns I won't be sooo depressed.

I need to start thinking about breaking it up into small goals but is so hard when you look in the mirror and realize there is so much work to be done. I looked at myself when I was getting dressed to go to the gym and it was like dear god what have I done to my body and then I went and sweated a gazillion beers out on the treadmill and then looked at myself again at the tanning bed (again save your energy and don't say shit to me about this) and why did I think I should be a goddess with one workout.

My partner in alligator crime CLP has thrown her scale out and I am really considering doing that as well for 2009. I do great and am so motivated as long as the weight is coming off and you let me have a bad day on the scale and bam...that chicken nugget ends up in my here is to you alligator molester...I will try it your way for a bit.

Gigi wasn't at the gym today thank god but the manager was and she was very happy to see me! Thank god I loaded the new ipod up last night with fun songs or else it would've really sucked!

Hope everyone had a great Christmas and is getting excited about their New Year's Eve festivities...I will be drinking a keg of millerlitas!!!!!!


Wednesday, October 29, 2008

I think I hate old people!

I am really worried about this statement but let me explain. Yesterday I had to recruit so I went to Food Lion to get some treats and I was already pissed because I couldn't have any of the chocolate I was buying. It was around 10am and I think this is prime shopping time for old people. Well Food Lion's customer service was taken a turn for the worse just like the damn stock market that has ruined my 401K (down 20K as of last Tuesday....ummm hmmm thats right). Well old people don't move as quickly as I would like...hello shouldn't they know that I got stuck in traffic and have to be at the school in 15 minutes. Well this old woman was complaining about the service. She had 5 boxes of banana cream Oreos. Ummm, I didn't get the memo that Oreos had started coming out in new flavors but I knew I was meeting with Gigi that afternoon so I just needed to block it out of my mind. After the cashier, who I believed had never smiled in her life, was done I headed to the parking lot. Granny had almost hit my car and took forever to put it in reverse. It was like old people were everywhere.

After recruiting I made it to my come to Jesus meeting with Gigi, who happens to be old but I forgot to tell you guys this yesterday. Gigi is a retired teacher and you know I had to ask..."were you a member of VEA?" Gigi responded with the correct answer "Of course". Thank God for her she was because the way my hips and thighs are hurting from her damn squats today I would be tempted to hurt her but she was VEA so I will be nice.

So anyway back to why I think I hate old people....This morning I couldn't get my big ass out of the bed to start this regimen. It was cold, Ella was so peaceful but Gigi was haunting me while I tried to sleep...."It is now or never for you Robin" so I got up...thankfully I slept in my workout clothes so I wouldn't have an excuse for not going. I learned that trick at a Weight Watchers meeting from a skinny bitch who had no need to be at a WW meeting.

Well I made it to the gym and I am doing this group of machines that are in a row...I forget what Gigi called it but basically I feel it is like being put back in Kindergarten after being out of college for 10 years. I tried to tell her that I was able to use free weights but she kindly reminded me that I had decided to drink beer and eat every appetizer in a 10 mile radius instead of working out and I had to go back to Kindergarten. Screw you Gigi! Well I went to start my first machine and sure as hell there was a Granny just sitting there chatting to a friend. Hello get the F off that machine and let my hell begin. Does she know that it took an hour to talk myself out of bed? And she was smiling...doesn't she know that she needs to be in pain and hating every minute? I finished with all of my machines and it was time for abs. If you've seen me lately you will know that my abs are basically non existent so I was dreading this. Well hot damn there is another Granny on the treadmill eyeing me like a hawk. First ab machine I went full strong because I knew she was watching me. Second machine I thought I was Gumby and my top half was about to separate from my bottom half. I looked at Granny and she was just watching me waiting for me to give up after 10 but I did my whole program. Screw you Granny I did it!

Here is what I did machines...even though the Grannies tried to railroad me and I did an hour on the treadmill. Shout out for the day goes to Brooke for loaning me her ipod until Santa comes. I burned a total of 552 calories on the treadmill. Wooohooo!

So I've heard from some of you and you seem to really like this blog. Honesty is the key and Courtney you know I will fall into a keg at some point. Brie...I find it pretty ironic Queen goes by Gigi as well. Love to the mother!

OK I am off to shower because the toxins coming out of my body are disgusting and if I am transforming to a Queen I have to be presentable at my meeting this afternoon. I hope I can get up off the floor....Richmond girls check on me and make sure I did...these muscles aren't too excited about what I just went through today...maybe Gigi knows what she is doing by sending me back to Kindergarten!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Time for Change

All of this talk about CHANGE with politics has made me think about the changes that I need to make in my life. I've been mullying it over since McCain started ripping off Obama's speeches about change and when my friend Chaney launched her blog I thought I will be McCain and steal her thunder. Ok enough with the political puns...

I realized that I had to have a personal trainer. I have to have that person to answer to and who will make me show up at the gym. I went to the gym yesterday and I had a moment of being saved. Instead of being in a church I was in a gym saying "take my potato chips and set me up with a trainer that will make me into a workout Queen!" So I met with a personal trainer today and if you know me you know I give my trainers nicknames so I can scream and yell about pain without them knowing I am giving them a shout out for a job well done. Today I met "Gigi". I am not being politically correct in any way with this nickname. Gigi appears to be a lesbian and is about my mom's age so I thought Gay Granny and wanted to be politcally correct so I termed her Gigi. Now don't start writing me comments about gay rights because for 16 years I've been way supportive of my gay best friend John. I also cleared this with Tim, who is one of my non politically correct friend, and he said he wasn't offended so I consider myself good to go with Gigi!

Gigi basically laid out a plan for the next month that makes me want to freak out. I have to do weight training 3 times a week and cardio everyday....JOY!!!!! Tomorrow morning is my first day back at weight training so if I can't type a post tomorrow you know the machines were killing me and I am probably saving my strength to make a voodoo doll of Gigi so she can feel pain.

So I am stealing Chaney's idea and keeping a blog where I will share this transformation from a couch potato to a workout Queen. I will share my eating habits, how I feel or how much I hate Gigi at the time. I might also share new fun foods that I find as I clean out my stash of chips. I will share my success and my failures. I will be honest when I fall into a keg of Milla Lite. I am thinking this is going to be a mixture of Bridget Jones meets Roseanne.

Wish me luck, feel free to sign up to be a follower and share any great ideas you have to help this transformation happen.